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Sam Ashwood
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Clean JOKES
hi all,
as this thread is Jokes, PLEASE RESIST reading the punch line first. thx.
1st joke.
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have you all heard that they discovered Dog Milk lasts Longer than Dairy/Cows milk?
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Do you know Why? ...
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Because No One Drinks It ! ha ha ha
lol lol lol
rofl
rofl
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11/1/2008, 1:32 pm
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Pyxis
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Re: Clean JOKES
What kind of lettuce did they serve on the Titanic?
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Iceberg.
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11/3/2008, 1:12 pm
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Hammerhil
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Re: Clean JOKES
I spent some time teaching in middle schools and heard some bad kids jokes. So here are a few...
How do you get a hundred Pikachus on a bus?
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You poke'em on!
BA DUM PUM CHING
What's brown and green and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you?
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A pool table!
Ok one more and I will stop.
What is red and goes up and down?
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A tomato in an elevator!
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Hammerhil Asceron/Rangerguy/Fireguy/Razorguy/Rottenguy
Foxy Boxers
Minty Freshness
Artemis Spearslayer
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11/4/2008, 1:37 am
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Keegen
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Re: Clean JOKES
Another bad kid joke.
What's green and has wheels?
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Grass...I lied about the wheels!
--- Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes.
That way, when you criticize them you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
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11/4/2008, 11:10 am
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RDarken
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Re: Clean JOKES
How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb?
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Hey, doyou wanttogo ridebikes???
Sister Logical and Sister Mathematical were walking late one evening. They noticed that a man was following them closely. At the first opportunity, they split up. The man kept following Sister Logical. Sister Mathematical made it back to the convent safely. She waited and waited for Sister Logical to return. After some time, Sister Logical did make it back and Sister Mathematical asked her what had happened.
"It was terrible!" Sister Logical said, "The man followed me for a long time. I tried to out run him, but he was much faster than me."
"Oh no!" Sister Mathematical gasped. "What happened next?"
"After he caught up to me, he pulled down his pants."
"Oh no, Sister! Then what happened?"
"Then I pulled up my skirt."
"Sister, I'm afraid to ask, but what happened next?!" Sister Mathematical asked, solemnly.
"The only logical thing that could have happened: A woman with her skirt hiked up can run MUCH faster than a man with his pants down!"
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- Darken
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11/4/2008, 2:02 pm
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Sam Ashwood
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Re: Clean JOKES
ha ha. good jokes all.
here's another 1.
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do you know that in a good Christian family it's the man that makes the Coffee?
u know why?
well in the new testament there's a whole book on it ....
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Hebrews !
lol
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11/5/2008, 1:17 pm
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Sam Ashwood
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Re: Clean JOKES
okay guys,
here's another one.
a priest, a rabbi and a minister walk into a bar.
the bartender says,
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what is this ?
a joke?
Last edited by Sam Ashwood, 11/12/2008, 10:44 pm
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11/12/2008, 10:39 pm
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Pyxis
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Re: Clean JOKES
A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar,
the minister ducks.
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11/13/2008, 1:44 am
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Greentongue
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Re: Clean JOKES
Lets try that again, only with sensitivity ...
A young man named John received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird's' mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. John tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to 'clean up' the bird's vocabulary.
Finally, John was fed up and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. John shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even ruder. John, in desperation, gave up, grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed. Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a Peep, was heard for over a minute.
Fearing that he'd hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door to the Freezer. The parrot calmly stepped out onto John's outstretched arms and said "I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I'm sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior."
John was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude. As he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, when the bird continued, "May I ask what the turkey did?"
=
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11/25/2008, 8:33 am
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Pyxis
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Re: Clean JOKES
LOL
Good joke Green.
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11/25/2008, 9:13 am
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