Dark Whole
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A boring tale of one chapter in my life that I hope never will close.
(Didn’t bother to change the names, to lazy to think of new ones… Why do I need to put this in the therapy section? Because I will need MANY years of therapy after all this.) (NC17)
“They decided yesterday I think. I’m sorry Adam; you just weren’t cut out for the job. “ Smack, smack, smack was the sound Marisa’s gum made as she chewed loudly over the phone. I held it back a few inches away from my ear. “I think I just might quit, this whole secretary thing isn’t working out for me. I need a job where I can really interact with people yea know, like an ice cream shop or something.” She paused. “Adam? Are you even listening to me?” I sighed.
“No, to tell you the truth I’m not. Thanks for the call Marisa but I really must be going.” I hung up with out waiting for a reply and shuddered slightly. Marisa. My former girlfriend who still wanted to stay ‘friends’. The way she tells people it sounds like SHE broke up with ME. Quite on the contrary. I couldn’t stand the woman. A stereotypical blonde who wouldn’t shut up. I think the most simulating conversation we had ever had was when she was talking about joining an animal rights club so she could meet new people. At least she had tried to get me that job even after we had broken up.
A job is what I needed most now. I had a part time job already but I need to find another one before Nathan moved out or I’d be royally screwed.
Nathan was my perverted roommate who would **** anything walking that didn’t insult him. See Nathan wasn’t the brightest of fellows and didn’t want to bother with anyone who had a brain capacity larger then his own, believe me, that is VERY small. But the boy (who was two years older then me) had a full time job that paid well, I was just his roommate and he liked me, so I was lucky. Damn Nathan for deciding to move and there was no way I was going with him.
I decided to go downtown again and drop off more of my resumes. Maybe one of the places would call up for an interview. I grabbed the large envelope full of papers, my bus pass (because I don’t drive) and made my way to the door. It was summer and I was wearing a long sleeve button up shirt with black pants, it was to hot for a coat. As I reached it I heard Nathan’s deep voice from my room.
“Oh yes.. That’s right.. Take it off.. Oh god yes..” The springs on my bed creaked at the same time as a thumping on the wall. Damn you Nathan. Only 1:00 and he’s already jacking off.
“Nathan you sick bastard! Get off my bed and stop looking at porn on my computer.” The one thing I got from Nathan was respect and the only things that were my own were my bed and my computer, I didn’t need him sliming them up. I finally got out the door and made my way down the street to the bus stop.
As I reached it I sat down with a sigh and leaned back. This would probably be the only rest I got all day other then sitting on the bus. How would I live without public transit? Not only does it get you to your destination for only a dollar-fifty but it also gives you some solitude and relaxing time. God. Listen to me. I’m thinking like a commercial.
The bus on my brain came to a skidding stop as I looked down the street. A girl was coming near. She was beautiful, or from what I could tell. I couldn’t really see her face because she was a reading a book, 1984 read the cover. Great book. She had long red wavy hair that came just past her shoulders; she was short but not to short. God I want to see her face. My lips flicked into a smile as she turned to sit down, she was a bit off target to where the bench was though. As she went to sit, to my surprise she had missed the bench completely and fell to the hard concrete. Her book spilled from her hands (she had lovely hands) and as I got up to help her I could see her face. I gasped for breath as I saw it. Her eyes were green, like an emerald, but they looked so alive, so full of energy that I knew she was one of a kind. Her lips were a perfect pink; the kind that didn’t need lipstick at all and her nose sat perfectly on her face. Her cheeks were slightly blushed as she looked at me. It made her even more beautiful.
“Are you ok?” I chuckled slightly as I stretched out my hand and as she took it I swear I had melted into the sidewalk.
“Oh yes I’m fine. How embarrassing. You must think I’m such a fool.” She laughed softly. “I never was good at first introductions. Hi, my names Lisa but most people call me Lilly or Lils.” She smiled then. That was it. That had done it for me, her smile. Her voice was beautiful and I said her 'names' over and over again and settled to call her Lilly.
“Well, Lilly, I think that was absolutely charming. My names Adam, but most people call me Xander.”
************
(will continue to write this for all my devoted readers *looks at the empty room* When I find more time. Ta ta.)
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11/8/2003, 8:42 pm
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Dark Whole
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Re: A boring tale of one chapter in my life that I hope never will close.
Lilly. Saying it reminded me of a song in a musical I once went to. The name I believe was “West Side story” and the song was “Maria”. You know how it went right? Maria, Maria the most beautiful sound in the world, Maria. Well that’s what Lilly’s name was like for me. I had never believed in love at first site before now. But now… now it’s different. Must sound like a real cornball right now but I swear it’s the truth.
It had been a week since the bus stop incident and I had never felt so alive. I had learned so much about her. Her favorite color is green and black, she loves music and she sings. Oh god she can sing. But every time I hear her voice it’s like a new song of it’s own. God what’s wrong with me. I had known this girl for a week and all of a sudden it was like I was a new person. Which I assure you I did not want to be. She fascinated me and I wanted to be with her as much as possible, so I invited her over. I was planning on giving her the best evening of her life, one she would never forget. Funny how even I get nervous sometimes.
I starred into the mirror. I hate to act full of myself. But damn I looked good. My hair was washed and it smelled really, REALLY good. I don’t remember the rest of the details; it seems so long ago now. Besides, the rest of the detail might make little boys and girls uncomfortable in the pant area. Now we can’t have that can we?
My eyes looked like ice. White, blue ice. I hated them. They were hard and never showed emotion, what I’d give to have soft brown eyes. Ones that I could look at Lilly with and not worry about making her feel hurt or unwanted. God knows she got enough of that from her family.
The doorbell finally rang after what seemed like an eternity of waiting. My head froze up and I began breathing deeply. Each of my steps towards the door seemed to slow down and the door seemed so far away now. What was I thinking? I shook my head and kept my cool as my strides picked up and my hand lay firmly on the doorknob. As I turned it and the door swung slowly open I instantly felt a pressure against my body. I was confused and almost frantic as I look beyond the door into the empty space where Lilly was suppose to be standing. Yes I am an Idiot. It took me a few seconds to realize she WAS the pressure on my body. Before the door had even fully opened she had given me a hug. God she was sweet. Literally. She smelt of candy and roses. I wrapped my arms around her brushed the top f her head with my lips. It was a tad bit damp, I’m guessing she had just had a shower. Damn images are creeping up into my head again! I shouldn’t be picturing naked girls in showers! It made me feel like Nathan and I did NOT want to feel like Nathan. The sick bastard that he was. Needed to watch him all the time, make sure he isn’t on my –
“I missed you, Xander.” Her sweet voice broke my concentration and filled my head with song and she spoke my name. If I died right now and went to heaven, nothing would be changed. Well except maybe we would be having –
“I missed you too Lilly. Now lets get going, I’ve got a surprise for you.” I smiled down at her and her big green eyes smiled up at me.
“Where are we going?” she asked curiously.
“If I told you it wouldn’t be much of a surprise now would it?”
“No I guess not.” I led her out the door and down the front steps of the apartment. It was a small place on the bottom floor. Convenient it was. I slipped out a blind fold and placed it over her eyes. As I tied it in the back my fingers slipped through each strand of her soft hair. I smiled and let go. “Oh what I’ve always wanted, to walk around in the dark.” She said with sarcasm dripping from every word. I chuckled.
“Oh what a pity you’ve figured me out.” The rest oh the walk was silent, even though the walk was very short.
I stopped her just on the sidewalk above the beach so I wouldn’t give it away by walking on the sand.
“Wait here and only take it off when I say it’s ok” I whispered in her ear. I grabbed the basket I had been carrying and sprinted down the steps. I fell to my knees as I reached the sand and threw open the basket. Ripping out almost everything at once, I wanted this to be perfect. I laid the blanket down and put the candles deep in the sand so they wouldn’t fall over. After lighting each one I grabbed the strawberries, the whipped cream and other deserts I had brought and laid them neatly on the blanket. It looked it over once and then sat down and put the most stupid (yet cutest) grin on my face.
“Ok, you can take it off now.”
Last edited by Dark Whole, 11/11/2003, 4:51 pm
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11/11/2003, 4:43 pm
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Dark Whole
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Re: A boring tale of one chapter in my life that I hope never will close.
(Forgot to say that I brought my guitar to the beach as well.. I brought my guitar)
I felt like I could throw up as she brought the blind fold just below her eyes. What if she thought I was a corny fool? I was screwed. I couldn’t see anything but her eyes, but I could tell she was smiling. They sparkled. Oh god they sparkled in the moonlight. ****, I’m turning into a cheese-ball.
“Surprise.” I muttered because that was all I could manage to say before she was on the beach and in my arms. She was so warm. “Lilly, I can’t breath.” I smiled at her.
“Oh, sorry.” She said flushing slightly. “Xander, this is perfect.”
I grinned and grabbed the strawberries, offering her some. She looked so cute when she ate. We stuffed our faces for a while and when we both got full we just lied on the sand and watched the stars. I felt like the luckiest man in the world. Her head was on my chest and I had one arm holding her close. We talked about things, like friends and family for a while, but mostly just lied there. I could have fallen asleep and I did, we both did, for along time. When we woke up it was already light out. Six in the morning. We laughed to each other and felt amazed that something didn’t eat us. Finally she got up.
“Where you going?” I asked immediately. Why is she leaving? She grinned at me.
“No where, fool. I just want to get something.” She bent over and grabbed her purse, taking out a camera and a permanent black marker.
“Why do you have a camera and a jiffy marker in your bag?” I said laughing.
“Shush, you. I like to take pictures and the marker’s in case I decide to deface something.” She grinned at me and I laughed. She instructed me to take of my shirt and turn around; of course I did so. I gasped as the cold tip of the pen hit my back. It moved smoothly along my skin, making my back tingle slightly.
“Stop moving, Xander.” She said firmly. When she was finished, she snatched up the camera and took a picture.
“So when do I get to see this master piece?”
“Later, put your shirt back on.” She smiled as I did. “Grab your guitar will you?” She took a picture of me with my guitar.
That wasn’t the end of it though, we walked for a bit and she took one of me by a tree,
and one on some rocks.
When she finished, she smiled lightly. “Now we’ll have something to remember it by.”
“But I didn’t take any pictures of you.”
“I don’t look good in pictures.”
“But it can’t all just be me.”
“Yes it can,” she smiled, looking up at me. “Besides, I’m out of film.” She pushed up on her tiptoes and gave me a light kiss on the lips. That’s it, just a brush of the lips and then skipped away. God, I thought as I ran after her, I know now.
I love her.
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11/20/2003, 11:23 pm
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Board's time is: 11/25/2009, 12:19 pm
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you do write well. Even when it is a personal account you give it imagery. God! I am vomiting niceness all over this page--hope you step in it 
