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Danglin
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Re: Open Marriage

"Open" marriages can be just about whatever a couple wants them to be. The "open" though implies that each partner has at least some limited consent from the other to have sex with a third party. Now, each couple can make their own rules, and limitations. So I'm sure there are couples that only sleep with other folks when they're together. But I also know folks who only sleep with folks and expressly agreee NOT to tell each other.

The key here is that if both parties don't agree, it's not open. If you fool around with others, then, it's just cheating. Communication is ALWAYS the key.
 
My wife and I have agreed that we can sleep with other people. The only ground rules I've gotten is that there are certain people I can't sleep with. Otherwise, I just have to be careful. In reality, in 10 years of marriage, I've only slept with 4-5 other women. And only one of them regularly. My wife has only slept with one other guy, and that's a regular gig.
8/12/2009, 2:19 pm Send Email to Danglin   Send PM to Danglin
 
Sharon73
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Re: Open Marriage

we have an open marriage. i told him I needed it to be this way. I didn't want to lie to him - I travel a lot sometimes and while traveling I need to have sex sometimes and the men are there and I am there, so I let him know what I was doing. He didn't have a problem with it and he has told me he has been with other females too. It works for us
8/15/2009, 11:10 pm Send PM to Sharon73
 
DavyJ1
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Re: Open Marriage

quote:
Danglin wrote:

My wife and I have agreed that we can sleep with other people. The only ground rules I've gotten is that there are certain people I can't sleep with.
If I may ask without being nosey, I am very curious as to how exactly does this work? Does she check out everybody for you ahead of time? Or are there just a few people on the "banned" list, like maybe, friendsor relatives of hers? Thanks for the info. This is a fascinating topic, although I am not sure it would be for me.
8/18/2009, 12:10 pm Send Email to DavyJ1   Send PM to DavyJ1
 
Danglin
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Re: Open Marriage

Hey DavyJ,

No, she doesn't check out people before hand. I'm sorta left to my own devices on that. And she trusts my judgment. For instance, I was travelling once on business and made a friend out of a busty collegue. I told my wife, and her first words were a very supportive "Did you get lucky?" The answer was no, but my wife was very willing for me to feel free to do so.

I'm not sure I'd go so far to say there is a "banned" list. There are just people she has asked me not to sleep with. So far, that is a crazy ex-girlfriend, a neighbor that is clearly willing but my wife finds "creepy," and an old friend of mine that my wife doesn't trust (though my old friend and I did sleep together after I was married and before the 'no' request).

Our regular friends came over last night. They've been gone awhile so we were all just visiting. Sitting around, catching up. But, without really realizing it, I noticed that our female friend had her head in my lap (face up) and I had my hand down her shirt, massaging her breasts. All this was going on while we were talking to my wife on another couch, and my female friend had her feet propped up in her husband's lap. And that's as far as it went. It was all very comfortable, causal and natural. Very nice way to live.
8/18/2009, 1:04 pm Send Email to Danglin   Send PM to Danglin
 
tinlizzievikingfan
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Re: Open Marriage

that sounds great..and that you respect the banned list..and she encourages you to be with others..the whole thing is no jealosies..

liz
8/18/2009, 3:10 pm Send Email to tinlizzievikingfan   Send PM to tinlizzievikingfan
 
Danglin
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Re: Open Marriage

Liz,

It does seem to work out. Last night, for instance, I went over to our friends house for a massage (I have a really tense back, right now). She gave a great massage, left the room, talked to her husband, came back and took off her clothes then jumped me. A few minutes later her husband came into join us. Needless to say, my friend was well rewarded for the massage.
8/19/2009, 8:21 am Send Email to Danglin   Send PM to Danglin
 
DavyJ1
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Re: Open Marriage

Thanks for the info, dangling. This certainly sounds cool, and everybody seems to be enjoying it. I doubt my wife would ever go for anything like that, but I am going to have to think about this one for a while.
8/21/2009, 8:37 am Send Email to DavyJ1   Send PM to DavyJ1
 
Sharon73
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Re: Open Marriage

I don't mind my guy with other women either.
8/26/2009, 6:19 am Send PM to Sharon73
 
Danglin
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Re: Open Marriage

You know, I'm absolutely thrilled to watch my wife be with another guy. It's one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen. When she's um, "doing" her boyfriend, she's naked, aggressively, vulnerable, horny, open, trusting, and oh so in to it. Those are some of things i love about her. It is a shear joy to watch. Of course, some times I help out, too. But watching is very, very good.

Also, I should point out the joys of sound. One time recently my wife an her boy friend were on the other couple's couch, and my girlfriend and I were on their bed. Doors open. Everyone going at it. Suddenly, I realize that both the women are moaning very loudly. My wife with the other guy, and the woman I am with. That was quite the turn on. But then it got to simultaneous screaming. OH MY GOODNESS. That was great. I do believe everyone was done at same time. Incredible.
8/26/2009, 7:29 am Send Email to Danglin   Send PM to Danglin
 
Carly44
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Re: Open Marriage

I think all that matters is what works out best for a couple. As long as both are in agreement on the rules, whatever they may be, then who cares? I think the problem is more when want wants an open marriage and forces it on the other. That can't turn out well for long.

I do not want an open marriage, but that doesn't mean my husband (we get married next year) and I won't play around with other couples. But if we do, it will only be together and with very good friends with whom we are very comfortable and where it just happens naturally as part of a close friendship.
8/28/2009, 4:15 pm  
 


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