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beachnudie
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Ever Introduced Friends to go Topfree or Nude?
Hey Everybody...
Now that it's almost summer here in the northern hemisphere we can start to wait for that first really great day when it's warm enough to go topless or nude outside at the beach or other similarly appropriate place. I've been speaking with a number of friends during these past few months and three want to visit a nude beach with me for their first time. They're all a bit uneasy about it (2 girls and a guy from my grad program) but they've heard me speak about how great it is for so long that they finally want to see for themselves.
Which brings me to the point of this thread: If you've ever had the chance to convince someone to try going topless or nude at the beach or someplace else, why not share the details with us? I'm guessing that we've all been in a similar situation and it would be pretty cool to see what influences we're collectively having on others. Obviously, the more bare skin that appears out there, the better it is for all of us.
Bare hugs...
Kristi
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5/1/2006, 3:06 pm
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JoUk
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Re: Ever Introduced Friends to go Topfree or Nude?
I tried to convince my BF to 'unlesah the beast' (lol!) on a beach in malta but he wasnt having any of it. not tried with any of my girlfriends though, or male friends for that matter, they might be quite shocked if they knew i had even been topless if they knew, i guess i'm quite shy 'in the person'
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5/1/2006, 3:28 pm
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ChuckFromSanO
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Re: Ever Introduced Friends to go Topfree or Nude?
Hey Kristi,
Great idea for a thread. I do have some successes to report. These are from last summer and the one before that.
I have been able to convince five women to try nude sunbathing. Two at my beach here in SoCal, and three at nudist resorts. The progression to the discussion of social nudity was pretty much the same for them all. In each case, the women were merely acquaintances who progressed into being pals over a long span of time; usually a minimum of 6-9 months. And I never brought up the topic until we had become pals and they were comfortable with me as a person first. It really takes just a tiny bit of boldness to bring it up and present the concept, but it does take some. FYI, I use the term “pals” to differentiate it from “friends.” A friend takes a long time to be. You have to get into each other’s lives; laugh with them, cry with them, take them to get their car from the shop, and go through good things and bad things with them. But you can have a pal with just a single shared interest, and you can be surprisingly close with a pal, just enjoying each others’company on that level.
One other thing: These were not dates. None of these were girlfriends. Only pals (“buddies” is another word for it). No romantic relationships at all.
So here’s my report, roughly in chronological order:
My Bakery Girl: She and another woman, both in their mid-20’s, worked in the bakery where I’d get my bagel every morning. Over time, we would exchange pleasantries to the point where we’d say things like, “So do you have plans for the weekend?” I would tell them about my surfing, and they would say things like, “That sounds fun, we should try that one of these days.” So after more time and the approach into summer (this whole process took about 9 months), I asked them if they would like to go and try surfing on my beginner’s board. Both of them said they would, so we talked about that over the next few weeks. So one day, the one asked me what people wear under their wetsuits. The perfect opening! I told her that women frequently wear their bikinis, but that men wear nothing since you just don’t want to try to pull a wetsuit over bulky trunks. She asked where do you change into wetsuits. I said they usually wrap a towel around themselves and do it that way, but it’s a real hassle. And THEN I SAID…”But you know, there’s a section of the beach where it’s legally clothing optional and so you don’t need to bother with a towel. You just pull off your trunks and put on the wetsuit, and no one cares. And of course, when you’re done surfing you can get the perfect tan!” And that’s what did it. She said that made a lot of sense. I described the beach and told her that’s where I go. I asked her if she would be okay with seeing other people nude, including me, even if she didn’t do it herself. She said that would be fine, and that it wouldn’t bother her. Eventually, we set a date and went. (The other woman was moving and couldn’t go.) And she surprised me by stuffing her swimsuit into her bag a soon as we were on our towels. She was like a bird out of a cage. She leaned back on her elbows and said, “I had no idea! This is wonderful! Thank you for not giving up on me.”
Cancun with a NorthernCal pal: Now this was different. I’d never been on a tropical vacation in my life, and I’d heard of a travel agency that specialized in nude vacations. They were doing a nude week at a resort in Cancun where they’d done a buyout of the whole place for the week. So I booked as a single, and mentally budgeted for a companion if I could find one among my female acquaintances. Well, two couldn’t go and one wasn’t comfortable with it, and one turned out to have a boyfriend she lived with, so I figured I’d just spend an excellent week in the sun chatting with the other guests (nude people are the friendliest on earth). Then one day I was on the phone to a publishing rep we use. We had become pals over the phone and would talk about stuff in general after we had gotten done with business. She knew about my trip (not the nude part), and said she was sure I’d have a great time anyway by myself. I stopped for a minute and thought, “Well, why not?” So I asked her if she wanted to go. Long pause. I told her this would be a non-romantic trip, that I won’t have sex with any woman I’m not married to, and that we would be just trip companions. A free trip to Cancun, same room, same bed, no sex…okay? She said, “A free trip to Cancun with no complications? Hell yes!” And then I told her the nude part. Long pause. But she was already comfortable with home nudity around her kids; just never went public before. She said she might not go nude herself, but she was fine around others who were. So she said Yes, and we went. We met for the first time when her airport van pulled up at the resort. Yeah, awkward for about 30 minutes, but then we were fine. She went nude on the third day (with some encouragement from me and our host couple), and never went back. The non-romantic part was wonderful; no complications, just fun. The other women there thought it was wonderful, and the men thought I was crazy.
Cappuccino Girl: Same as my Bakery Girl. I would get my Chai Latte tea at a coffee bar Sunday mornings before going to the beach. Over a 6-month period, I and the Japanese-American girl at the store (low 20’s) got to be pals and would talk surfing and sunshine. She didn’t like cold water and liked pools. Ultimately, I told her about my Palm Springs resort that offers day use. As an Asian, she had some cultural things to get past, but in the end she came with me for her first time publicly nude. After about 15 minutes of nervousness, she was completely vegged out in the sun and loving it.
Nightclub Pal: This took about 6 – 8 months also. I started going to happy hour on Fridays at a very nice little nightclub near my work. Just two drinks to unwind, and then leave. Live band on Fri & Sat. I would sit in the same place and the same waitress would serve me. Same progression as the others, just getting to be pals. One night she said, “God, I’d like to just get in the sun and forget everything for a day!” Another perfect opening line. I told her about the resort that offers day use (not the nude part yet) and invited her to come as my guest just for a day in the sun and not for a date. She said yes, and then I told her the nude part. Long pause. But the non-sexual nature of the resort and my enthusiasm for how wonderful it is convinced her. She was real nervous going in but said she kept repeating, “What’s the worst that could happen? I won’t like it and I won’t do it again.” In 15 minutes she was in heaven in the sun. We went back three more times, until she got a boyfriend.
Swimsuit Girl: Mid 20’s. She came to the CO beach with friends whom I knew. She kept her suit on all through the day. In the afternoon, I said Hi and introduced myself as I was heading out to the water with my board (nude). When I came back, I walked by her and asked if she wanted to come to my location and have some vanilla rum & root beer (my favorite…like a root beer float!) She came over and we just talked casually over chips & floats. I asked her if she’d ever gone topfree or nude in public. She said no. So I asked her if she would care to try it in small stages, just to see what it’s like and decide if she liked it or not. We were kind of far from her group, and my board was up on its edge forming a kind of privacy fence. I said that this was a great opportunity to try it without her friends seeing her, and with someone who wasn’t trying to hit on her or anything. I said that she should do everything in the beginning lying on her stomach, and to first just untie her top as women frequently do, but then go ahead and put it completely aside. Then just feel how sun feels for 5 minutes. No more than 5, and then tell me how it feels. She did, and when I called 5 minutes, she said, “I’m okay. I’ll leave it off.” So I said that the next step would be to turn on her back and feel the sun on her breasts. Again, just 5 minutes and then turn back over if she wanted. But in 5 minutes she said, “This feels really good. I’m liking this.” Same for her bottoms. First on her stomach to feel the sun on her butt for the first time, and then over on her back. Same reaction, “Wow, this is really great! I’m fine with this!” And then she completely floored me. It was a real hot day on the beach, and she was lying on her back. She suddenly sat up and said, “I’m really hot. I’ve got to cool off!” And she jumped up and ran to the water screaming, “Wooooooooooo!” and jumped into the surf. I walked down and just watched her enjoying the water in new-found, complete freedom, and smiled my butt off. Some people around me said, “Isn’t this her first time? Look at her! Did you convince her to try it? You should congratulate yourself!” Yep, I felt pretty good. She actually walked nude over to her group for lunch, leaving her suit on my towel so she couldn’t put it on even if she wanted to. Which she never did.
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5/1/2006, 5:30 pm
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barb9
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Re: Ever Introduced Friends to go Topfree or Nude?
Having a hot tub really helps!! I've introduced a few other female friends to the joys of being topfree and also nude there. We've had hot tub parties with many couples and at times just one other couple. It seems like a hot tub lends itself to going topfree at first, the guys liked it especially, but the females also enjoyed it. From being topfree it was an almost natural progression to nudity as when we went topfree the guys went nude - so we have joined them. One couple we know likes it so much they bought their own, and larger, hot tub now. Our next steps with them is to visit a nude beach with them
Barb
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5/2/2006, 8:05 am
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JoUk
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Re: Ever Introduced Friends to go Topfree or Nude?
i may have to swing by for a hot tub sometime barb, if that's cool with you? 
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5/5/2006, 12:52 pm
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barb9
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Re: Ever Introduced Friends to go Topfree or Nude?
Great idea - lets get together!! The hot tub is marvelous
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5/5/2006, 1:31 pm
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JoUk
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Re: Ever Introduced Friends to go Topfree or Nude?
alright, but no touching
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5/6/2006, 7:48 am
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maureenmcm
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Re: Ever Introduced Friends to go Topfree or Nude?
One week ago.
I was playing raquetball in an alley as we could not get court time. My friend, 52, female and a professor , and I decised to shed our sweaty tops and dry off a bit before putting on fresh tops. A work crew was nearby, peeked a bit, but didn't pose a nuisance.
She had never done anything like that before but found it exhilarating...
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5/7/2006, 11:27 am
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JoUk
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Re: Ever Introduced Friends to go Topfree or Nude?
Good for you Maureen! wish i had th courage to do something like that. Was it pretty secluded or a little more out-in-the-open?
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5/7/2006, 12:53 pm
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ventanabare
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Re: Ever Introduced Friends to go Topfree or Nude?
Hi, everyone. This is an important topic. Thanks, Chuck, for your sensitive and patient advocacy of human freedom. Here are some thoughts I shared last April on a previous thread. Since many people are new to the site, I felt it might be helpful to add them to this conversation.
All our friends know our backyard and house are ‘topfree zones’ as often as possible. I’ve been openly topfree for over 20 years, so only new friends are ever surprised when they visit our home or yard.
You know how some people expect you to take off your shoes as you enter their home? Our home and backyard are topfree like they are shoe-free. Off the driveway, friends and neighbors enter the backyard through a gate—on the other side of that gate, they see a series of wooden pegs on the wall of the house. If I’m enjoying our yard topfree, I simply hang a T-shirt on one of the pegs—this means that everyone else is expected to be topfree too, men and women. A few times, we’ve had all the 8 pegs used with T-shirts and bras. It’s taken many years to make this practice natural for our friends—influencing other with the option of freedom is not a short-term process.
Similarly, we have a coat-tree in the entry of our house—when neighbors and friends come for a backyard barbecue or a nonchalant happy hour, they know that if they see a T-shirt hanging on the coat-tree, they too are expected to follow the house rule of topfreedom. My husband and I greet our guests topfree and invite them into our home and into our yard—it’s wonderfully freeing to be out in the open as a joyful topfree woman.
How do I try to influence other women to be topfree with me? I simply make it natural to be topfree in our yard and in our home at times, inviting others to join me and my husband in an equal opportunity nipple liberation environment. What fun!
While I also enjoy being casually nude with friends, I feel really good about introducing women and men to the many sensual pleasures of topfreedom. I know I'm biased because of my own experiences, but I believe the best way to introduce others to topfreedom and casual nudity is to share it as a natural and fulfilling part of your life.
Joyfully topfree in just a short sarong,
Jane
Last edited by ventanabare, 3/19/2007, 3:54 pm
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5/8/2006, 5:08 pm
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